Every four years, the FIFA World Cup rolls around and football fans across the world don their national colors to support their team, hoping and praying for a victory. But given the four years we have to wait between each event, it’s no wonder that tensions run pretty high during the tournament. And given that there are 32 teams participating, and only one winner, you’re left with a whole lot of disappointment for the majority of the fans. Watching the World Cup is a roller coaster of emotions for fans. Here’s a stage-by-stage guide to help you identify what exactly you are feeling.
Anticipation
It’s coming! Four more months! Twenty more qualifying matches! IT’S HERE! The moment you’ve been waiting for since stupid Spain clinched the title in 2010 – the 2014 FIFA World Cup has ARRIVED! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, here we GO!
Excitement
Your team has made it into the tournament! You’ve got your group! You have already thought of a half dozen witty puns to make fun of the other teams in your group! The first game is only days away, and you’re PUMPED. Like a kid on Christmas Eve, you just can’t wait for the big day!
Pride
You have never loved your country (or owned quite so much patriotic apparel) as you do right this second. The 11 men on the field are more than just footballers – they’re ambassadors for your country, and representatives of all that is good and wholesome in the world. They are your boys, and you will stand by them until the end.
Hope
This could be it – 20 minutes left and you’ve got the lead by two goals! Just hold out for a bit longer and you’re through to the round of 16! From there, it’s smooth sailing to the quarter-finals, the semi-finals, and the championship! Nothing can get in your way! This is your year, baby! You can feel it, it’s happening, it’s about to ….
Disbelief
Wait, what? What just happened? Did they really just score two goals within the last two minutes of the game (sorry, Mexico)? That can’t be right. Let’s watch the replay. Seriously? How? What? Why? You’re speechless. Your brain can’t process what’s happening. It’s a coping mechanism.
Agony
WHY? WHY, OH WHY MUST THEY DO THIS TO US EVERY TIME? They get our hopes up, have us believing it could really happen, and then just crush our souls in the last few minutes of every match. Your heart aches, your body feels like it’s just been hit by a bus, and you don’t know whether you want to cry or run out and find the first fan of the opposing team and punch them. You probably already did both.
Depression/Grief
Colors are duller, scents are weaker, and happy music just sounds tinny and moronic to your ears. Smiling is a thing of the past, and you can’t remember what you sound like when you laugh. You’re either hibernating alone in your room, or you’ve turned to the bottle (to be fair, you were drinking during the whole match, but now it’s the depressing kind of drinking, not the fun kind). You don’t know if you’ll ever be happy again.
Anger
What the HECK was that? Where was the defense in those last few minutes? How could he have kicked the ball out with no time to spare? Why didn’t we pull up our goalie and go for the goal with an extra man on in the last second? It’s like they were TRYING to lose! Don’t they care about us? About their country? About ANYTHING? The match was fixed! They’re all getting a big payout for lying down and doing NOTHING! IT’S ALL A SCAM!
Acceptance
You know what? We really played well. You can tell those boys put everything they had and more into that match, and it was an exciting game! At least we didn’t get embarrassed, right? It’s just fun to watch football again, no? And now we’re free to root for Costa Rica, because seriously, who saw that coming? Wait. Now that Costa Rica has also exited the tournament, I guess we’ll go for…er…Brazil? Who doesn’t love to see the host country go bonkers when they win?