Beanie Babies

For those who hopped on the Beanie Baby train back in the 90s, you’ll be sorely disappointed to learn that the plush toys won’t resell for much more now than their original retail value of $5 or $6. Stories of collectors stockpiling them in the hopes of buying a car or paying for college down the line abounded, but the Beanie Baby bubble had to burst eventually (probably around the time that people realized they were nothing more than cheaply made stuffed animals…).

Pokémon cards

Similar to Beanie Babies, Pokémon struck a chord with child and adult collectors alike, and people began fiending for the rate Charizard or Snorlaxes out in circulation. Single cards were going for hundreds of dollars, and entire collections could be sold for thousands. But yet again, the bubble burst and those who hadn’t unloaded their cards were left with hundreds of ugly animated characters on strips of plastic, barely worth the protective casings holding them.

Records

Unless you have the only vintage signed copy of a live recording of a band with a cult following that’s still around, your records are worthless. Yes, they’re still sold in stores and you can probably unload them for pennies on the dollar, but people don’t really care about them anymore. This could have something to do with the fact that they sound like a tinny toy overlaid with a cat scratching a chalkboard compared to the slightly higher definition options we have today.

Furby

They’re terrifying and creepy and will sooner haunt your nightmares than help you strike it rich. They were billed as collectors’ item from the get go (because they were too scary to market to children), but never gained the artificial worth of others on this list. The only thing a Furby is guaranteed to give you is a heart attack when you’re rifling through boxes in storage and it pops out still demanding to be fed (seriously, how do those batteries never die?!).

Your car, as soon as you drove it off the lot

Doesn’t matter if it has 0.25 miles on the odometer and nary a scratch in sight – if you signed the papers and got behind the wheel, your car just depreciated 15 percent. But don’t worry, when you sell it back to the dealership three years later for the price of a single tank of gas, they’ll rehab your ride and sell it again for nearly the same price as you paid for it.

Cabbage Patch Kids

In line with the Furby (but less terrifying and more plain ugly), Cabbage Patch dolls took flight in the 80s and became one of the first toy crazes to cause near riots in stores – especially during the holiday season. Though their retail value hovered around $30, collectors were spending hundreds to purchase early “vintage” versions which are now selling for about…$30. Oh well.

Comic books

Lines would go around the corner at comic book stores to get the new release of Batman’s latest adventures, or to learn what the Avengers were up to. But while there are some collectors who will probably still shell out hundreds for that untouched, pristine copy in its protective plastic, the majority of these have ended up in bargain bins selling for pennies. After all, aren’t most comic books just online now?

POGs

It’s hard not to see this one coming – POGs (pictured above) were literally just pieces of cardboard with graphics printed on them that were used to stack up and slam in the hopes of making them fall off and land face-up. But somehow, the game pieces became something people sought out, and rare POGs (such as the Power Rangers of Wizard of Oz versions) were selling for hundreds of dollars at one point. Chances are you won’t make anything close to that much anymore, but they might make a nice coaster?

Precious Moments figurines

The little cherubic, porcelain-faced dolls that became extremely popular in the 1990s were available for a variety of occasions – holidays, birthdays, or even special versions such as Disney characters. But while they sold for anywhere between $20 and $80 or so, there was a brief period when buyers were convinced that that value would skyrocket as time went on. Rare versions were selling for upwards of $1,000, but now would have difficult time garnering what they cost two decades ago.

A college degree

This is only kind of a joke – while it used to be that a bachelor’s degree made you stand out in a group of applicants, in many places, it just keeps you in the mix. With unemployment high across the world, employers are getting more and more picky about who they hire, and having gone to college doesn’t carry the same gravitas as it once did. Though it’s still impressive and desirable, just don’t expect your interviewer to be wowed by the four years you spent playing beer pong – er, I mean, attaining a higher education.