Most people think they’d like to be in the Guinness Book of World Records one day. Whether it was most kittens rescued from trees, strongest man in the world, or biggest pizza ever made and consumed by one person (my personal goal) – it all seems pretty cool. But every now and then, there are those that take the competition to new levels in their pursuit of some of the weirdest, grossest world records ever created. Some were not necessarily the fault of the winner, but still.
Largest tumor ever removed
In 1991, a 303.2-pound ovarian cyst tumor was removed from a woman in California. For reference, that is the weight of the trunk of an elephant, a large reindeer, or a giant panda. In a woman’s uterus. There was a giant panda in a woman’s uterus. Let that sink in. It makes the 56-pound tumor that was removed from a 70-year old woman in Texas back in May 2012 look like child’s play. Either way, the moral of the story is that if your stomach starts growing like a beach ball and you notice a hard mass under your skin, go to the doctor. Please.
Farthest distance of milk squirted out of an eye
This bizarre feat was achieved by Ilker Yilmaz at the Armada Hotel in Istanbul, Turkey in September 2004. He squirted milk from his eye at a distance of nine feet, two inches, after sucking it in through his nose – an art that apparently he, and he alone, has mastered. The only thing to really say about this is that his parents must be so proud.
Largest collection of Barbie dolls and/or Hello Kitty memorabilia
Bettina Dormann of Germany has been collecting Barbie dolls since 1993, and currently has 15,000 of them. We can only assume that this means she owns all the regular dolls, as well as the event-specific and celebrity pieces. Really, it’s just impressive that 15,000 different dolls exist. Similarly, Asako Kanda in Japan is the proud owner of 4,519 different pieces of Hello Kitty memorabilia. This includes everything from a frying pan to a toilet seat, a truly terrifying number of stuffed dolls, and everything in between.
Longest fingernails
Sure, it can get annoying to have to cut your fingernails all the time. But these folks took it to new heights with their commitment to never undertaking the task while apparently maintaining extraordinary nail strength. The title for the women goes to Lee Redmond of Salt Lake City, Utah, as measured in February 2008. Her 10 nails had a combined length of 28 feet, four-and-a-half inches. Sadly, she lost her nails in an automobile accident in early 2009, but we can only hope that she got back on the horse and started growing again. But the real winner here is Melvin Booth of Troy, Mich., whose nails measured an incredible 32 feet 3.8 inches in May 2009.
Hairiest teenager
Thirteen-year-old Supatra “Nat” Sasuphan of Thailand has the incredibly rare Ambras syndrome, which makes hair grow all over her face. The syndrome is caused by a faulty chromosome, and there have been only 50 documented cases dating back to the Middle Ages. Although she used to be mocked as “Werewolf Girl” and was constantly teased by classmates, it seems that receiving the world record for her condition actually upped her popularity at school! As long as her mom keeps everything trimmed so she can see, and she uses baby shampoo for her sensitive skin, all is well!
Most tattooed senior citizen
Former special forces soldier Tom Leppard of the U.K. has been known as the Leopard Man of Skye for the last 20 years, and for good reason. At 74, he has tattooed 99.9 percent of his body with a leopard-skin design. He is largely considered a hermit by the other residents of the Isle of Skye. It might just be how well he camouflages, though.
On the ladies’ side, the prize goes to Isobel Varley, also of the U.K., who has covered 93 percent of her body with tattoos. The only unpainted surfaces are her face, ears, soles of her feet, and some parts of her hands.
Gurning World Champion (most wins)
You know how when you made faces as a kid, your mother warned you that if you did it long enough, it would get stuck in that position? Apparently you should have kept practicing. Gurning competitions, or distorting facial expressions, are real – and they can earn you a spot in the Guinness Book of World Records. Tommy Mattinson from the U.K. won the Gurning World Championship an amazing 12 times – in 1986 and 1987, and 10 more times between 1999 and 2010. Supposedly he gurned for the queen in 2008, and she was not impressed.
Loudest burp
Ah, burping. Another thing your mother probably told you not to do. (Seriously, why are they trying to ruin our chances of fame?) This one goes out to Paul Hunn of the U.K., when he let go an astounding 109.9-decibel belch at Butlins, Bognor Regis, in August 2009. For a frame of reference, 118 decibels is a clap of thunder. But, like any professional, it all comes down to training. In an interview, he revealed his routine: forgo breakfast, have a fizzy drink, lean forward, take deep breaths, open the throat, and let it roll. Take note.
Most Big Macs consumed
If medical research has taught us anything, it’s that maybe consuming enormous quantities of Big Macs isn’t the best thing in the world. But apparently Donald Gorske of Fond du Lac, Wis., didn’t get the memo. His daily consumption of Big Macs has been going on for 37 years, and he consumed his 23,000th burger on Aug. 17, 2008. This was the date of the official Guinness certification, but he claims to have reached well over 26,000 as of 2013. What’s even more amazing is that at his first doctor’s visit in over 25 years in 2011, he learned his cholesterol was below average.
Most rotations hanging from a power drill in one minute
This one made the list just for the sheer creativity of it – who actually came up with this idea and thought it would be a worthwhile thing to try? And then actually got good at it? Well, the answer is The Huy Giang of Cologne, Germany. He spun 148 times in a minute while hanging from a power drill in December of 2008. It’s probably more impressive that the wall didn’t come down, but still. Good on you, Mr. Giang.