Did you really just spend money on a rock that you could have found outside for free? Even if you did find it outside, did you really just give it to your kid and have him name it to get him off your back about getting a puppy? It’s not going to work. A rock is not, and will never be, a puppy, Dad.
Just…no.
Seriously. Just look at it. It’s terrifying. Why would you want to traumatize your kid this way?
This is a plastic pooping dog. I repeat, a plastic pooping dog. Presumably to teach kids to pick up after their dogs. Although, given that they probably won’t, you just bought a plastic toy that is about to poop all over your house.
Please don’t teach your 7-year-old that breastfeeding is fun. Breastfeeding is not fun, and neither is child pregnancy. Save that for another 20 years, when you’re trying to convince them to give you grandchildren.
Are you really trying to convince your kid that she’s playing by cleaning the windows and mopping the floor? Ignoring all of the messages that you’re sending them about their future prospects, this just feels like a lazy parent move.
Because airport security is so much fun! Make sure all those bottles are still under the Lego-equivalent of three ounces, or we’ll have a problem.
That song is enough to drive anybody up the wall. Save your sanity and get your kid something quieter.
It’s a huge inflatable tub that you fill with gross gooey sludge that your kids roll around in. Basically ensuring that you’ll spend the next several hours trying to shower it off of them, and that they’re prepared for a future of jello/mud wrestling.
It’s not a pet, and it’s not a plant. It’s a weird-shaped thing that grows a bizarre grass thing out of its head. You know those expressions about watching grass grow? It’s not actually fun. This is not a toy, parents.
