Kids may just be like tiny, drunk adults, but there are plenty of things they can do that we aren’t allowed, no matter how many beers we’ve had. And while there are bonuses that come with getting older – getting wiser and blah, blah, blah – kids just kind of have the sweeter deal. Here are 10 things kids do that adults wish they could.
We all love people watching, but we have to be discreet about it – shady sunglasses, darkened windows, the surreptitious peek over a newspaper. But kids just go for it, open mouths and all. So when the lady with the purple mohawk and samurai swords walks by you and your kid while you’re strolling in the park, just guess who’s going to get the better look.
Bubbles are miraculous. You know that, I know that, and your kid definitely knows that. But, due to society’s rigid standards, we can’t prance around the park squealing and try to catch them all. That’d be weird.
How many times a day would you like to crawl under your desk for a quick snooze? If you’re anything like me, the answer would be anywhere between three and a billion, depending on the availability of coffee. Kids not only get to take naps, they are forced to. Can you imagine your boss coming in, turning off the lights, and tucking you in for an hour or two? At least the Spanish have it right – that siesta thing really needs to catch on worldwide.
Have you ever been so into a meal that you just wanted to spread it all over your face? Like truly get in there and taste it? Everyone knows that you taste with your hands (and your cheeks, and your forehead, and your arms…), so why have we, as adults, been limiting ourselves with forks and knives? The messier you are after finishing a meal, the more you know you enjoyed it.
Sometimes you just get tired. But since you now weigh more than a few kilograms, nobody’s offering to schlep you around to get you off your feet. So prepare to continue slogging your way down the sidewalk, carrying that enormous briefcase, because ain’t nobody about to lend you a hand.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if anytime your stomach even thought about starting to growl, somebody would be by your side with a selection of fruit, crackers, and cookies? Say goodbye to the “hangry” (hungry + angry = hangry) time of day, because that’s not even close to an issue anymore.
Sometimes you may feel like you could scream. Well, if you’re a kid, you can. And while people will think you’re annoying, they won’t be calling the kind folks at the closest psychiatric facility to come pick you up.
Imagine walking over to a group of adults, slapping one on the shoulder, and darting away, giggling. The game of tag is on! But this is Adult World, and they won’t be chasing you unless they thought you were trying to steal their purse.
This is probably the biggest one. Why did we decide that we had to abandon diapers at a certain age? Because sometimes there just isn’t a bathroom handy, and you’ve got to go.
Think about it: when you’re a little kid, somebody else buys your food, pays your rent, does your laundry, cleans up after you, and even wipes your butt. And what do you have to do in return? Nada, my friend. If only they knew how good they had it.